I face a great dilemma. I can't for the life of me convince my girlfriend to see a horror film with me. It isn't quite the same seeing horror flicks with a group of guys. We want to see our girlfriends react to the most horrifying scenes, not because we get a kick from watching them squirm (least not all of us do), but because it actually enhances the viewing experience. Plus I find it cute when my girlfriend struggles to cover her eyes and ears simultaneously and is forced to bury her head in my shoulder.
A little background as to why I am enamored by horror films of yore... I grew up watching classic Universal horror films; Dracula, the Werewolf, Frankenstein and the Mummy (which I dressed up as for Halloween in 1st grade). When I was a child I would run and hide under the table, cover my eyes and peek through the slits of my fingers during any tense scene. I also did that during love scenes. Then I started to get exposed to the slasher genre which started with Alfred Hitchcock's horror classic "Psycho," and was then mastered by John Carpenter in "Halloween."
The film that ended up terrifying me the most was William Peter Blatty's "The Exorcist." I couldn't sleep comfortably for days. I also read the book which is just as scary as the film. There is probably no way I'll be able to successfully convince my girlfriend to watch the film or read the book. I probably can't even bribe her with a Gucci purse.
Convincing my girlfriend to see a horror flick with me would be a great feat, but I can't think of any creative or convincing ways to get her to watch them with me. My only options are to:
A) Get her really drunk, but that isn't fun as she'll be too beligerent to react to the film.
B) Lie. Just tell her I'm taking her to see the sequel to "The Notebook" and act like I accidently bought the wrong movie tickets.
C) Bind her against her will. This might lead to a restraining order though. Not a good option...
D) Promise you'll do anything for her if she'll go. This usually doesn't work out too well for me since I'll probably end up doing anything for her anyway.
E) Beg or plead. You'll lose some points in manliness, so it is a risk/reward situation. Ask yourself, 'does the end result justify the means?'
If any of you can think of other options or anecdotes that have proven to work, please share them! I'll update my readers if I am somehow able to successfully convince my girl to see a horror film with me. Until then, I swallow a bitter pill and watch dehumanizing films with her, better known as "chick flicks." The horror... the horror.
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3 comments:
Ok, I don't know about you, but if I was your girlfriend, I would totally see ANY horror film for a Gucci purse, ha. :P I'll sit in for her and go see a movie, lol. ;)
So... which Gucci purse would you recommend and when are you available? Maybe I can buy her a fake one and she wouldn't be able to notice a difference, ha. Then again, women have a keen sense of knowing what is real and what is fake...
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